Onnie Michalsky (00:00.718)
Hey Moms Without Capes, in today's episode, we're addressing a common struggle among moms, that is finding time to indulge in the simple pleasure of reading. I understand that juggling the demands of parenthood, work, and daily life can often leave little room for leisure activities. But I firmly believe that carving out time for yourself, especially through reading, is absolutely essential for your wellbeing.
Whether you're a seasoned bookworm longing to rediscover your love for literature, or you're a mom looking to incorporate more self -care practices into your routine, then this episode is for you. I'm going to be sharing with you practical strategies and actionable tips to help you reclaim those precious moments for reading, even amidst the busiest of your schedules. To be fully transparent, my ultimate goal is to help you make
the decision of joining the Moms Without Capes book club, a no brainer, where you can connect with other high performance moms who are reading and growing together. So if you're ready to reignite your passion for reading and reclaim some much needed me time, grab your favorite book and tune into this episode to learn how to do so. So if you're new to Moms Without Capes, I'm Ani Myszowski. I am a therapist, life coach, and recovering supermom.
And I'm here to help you hang up your own Supermom cape so that you can get back in touch with the woman who's been put on the back burner for way too long. This podcast is where you'll discover that your true superpower shine when you stop trying to be a Supermom. Welcome to the show. One of the biggest challenges for moms is finding the time to read when we have such a busy schedule filled with childcare and household chores, work, other commitments. Another one is fatigue.
We are often exhausted. And when you're trying to read, whether it be in the early morning, at late at night, when you're going to bed, it can be really difficult to muster the energy to read, especially if you haven't been prioritizing sleep or relaxation.
Onnie Michalsky (02:19.278)
Being constantly interrupted can be challenging, especially when you're trying to read. Constant interruptions from children or other family members can disrupt your reading sessions and make it very challenging to concentrate and just enjoy the book. Some moms may feel guilty about taking time for themselves to read, especially if you're perceiving it as nonproductive or an indulgent activity. When your to -do list is so long,
you might feel a tad bit guilty or maybe even a lot of guilt when it comes to actually sitting down and enjoying something for yourself. You can feel overwhelmed by the sheer number of books that you want to read. And you might come up with analysis paralysis or decision fatigue or decision paralysis or whatever you feel you're never going to catch up. And so you might look at that pile of books or look at that long list of books that you wanted to read or that have been recommended to you. And you decide that there's just no way you can even.
begin to tackle it so you don't tackle it at all. I know I have a whole pile of books on my nightstand. I just moved a bookcase into my room because I have a lot of books that I have been compiling over the years that I want to get to, which is one of the reasons why I started Moms with that Capes book club is to start getting through those books and implementing what they contain. So many things on our minds, we could struggle to focus on reading, finding our thoughts, wandering or feeling unable to fully immerse ourselves in a book.
And then finally, we might not have access to those books. We might have limited financial resources. We might not have access to a library or a bookstore. Maybe the books that you want to read aren't just easily found. So how do we overcome these challenges? It comes down to being strategic, being intentional, because when you're feeling super tired, when you're not having...
the energy or being able to focus on sitting down and actually getting through a book. Today, I want to offer you some tips and some strategies that you can use to be more intentional and actually make the time to read. So the first one is that limited time. This requires strategic planning and prioritizing. Two things you can do. One is to create a reading routine.
Onnie Michalsky (04:39.148)
Schedule dedicated time for reading each day, even if it's just for 10 to 15 minutes before you go to bed or during your lunch break or in the morning. Use your bookends. I did a whole podcast episode about this, about using your bookends to be able to create those pockets of time. And usually by bookends, I mean morning, nighttime, weekends, like using those times that are less busy or less consuming of your time.
to be able to fit in things that are going to make you feel alive and make you feel good. So consistency is key to building a reading habit. Something that has helped me that I learned and I shared about this before is the two day rule. You can make it a three day rule. Whereas you don't give yourself more than two or three days, whatever your rule is, to not do that thing or let me explain. So.
I wanted to create a habit of moving my body every day. I talked about this. This was part of my goal setting for the next 12 weeks, which is coming to an end at the end of March. And I had been very good with being consistent with doing the things I said I was going to do. So one of my things was moving my body and I joined plan of fitness a while ago, like months ago. And in December, I started that habit of
going to the gym. I was like, okay, I'm like, I can do this. It's right down the street from me. I just need to figure out when I can do it. Because one of the things that I had was if I don't work out in the morning, it doesn't get done. And I knew that that wasn't serving me. I had to get past that. And come January, I learned about this rule called the two day rule. And what it was, was I can give myself grace. There's days that are not going to, I'm not going to get to the gym, but
The next day I know that I need to get to the gym. Like I don't let myself go more than two days without doing what it is that I say I'm going to do. So to apply this, the two day rule to reading, and maybe again, it might be three day rule for you. Don't let three days go by without reading, whether it's just 10 minutes, two pages, whatever it is, you can get through a book by being consistent. So creating that reading routine could be helpful.
Onnie Michalsky (06:58.989)
And then multitasking. This is another strategy that could help you get past that limited time. I am not an advocate. Let me just make that clear. I am not an advocate for multitasking. It takes, I think up to 20 minutes to actually transition to a task. And like when you get distracted to come back to that task and get back into it, get back into the flow, it takes you up to 20 minutes to transition.
And so multitasking is just you constantly being distracted and that can really elevate your stress level and do havoc to your body. So I am not a big advocate for multitasking. And sometimes we take that as pride. Oh, I'm a great multitasker. No, no. Like that is why we are walking around like giant stress balls all the time is because we think that we're good at multitasking. But when it comes to reading, sometimes it can help.
to multitask by pairing a high energy with a low energy. So perhaps you're cooking dinner or you can have an audio book on driving in the car. For a long time, I couldn't do that because my kids would start talking and my mind would wander. But nowadays I'm able to do that. And I don't know if I trained myself to do that or how that happens, but now I can do it. Maybe my kids got more distracted and weren't interrupting as much or they started to respect my boundaries or whatever it was. But looking for opportunities to pair activities.
listening to audio books while you cook, clean, exercise, commute. It allows you to read while still taking care of your daily activities or responsibilities. I always have lots of different books going on. Like I'm usually reading a few different books at any one time and not at any one time, but like in the month. I've got a couple books that I read, like one in my car, one on my nightstand.
One, I read in the early morning after I get done my Bible and I will have an audio book. I'm trying to think of all the different places that I read while I'm waiting for my kids to come in from the bus. Like I'll just read a couple of pages and it works. Being tired might be another reason why you aren't reading. So two ways you can deal with that. Making self -care a priority by ensuring adequate rest, nutrition and relaxation.
Onnie Michalsky (09:16.909)
Taking care of your physical and mental wellbeing can help combat fatigue and make it easier to engage in activities like reading. I'm not even gonna go into that because that's all I talk about is how to prioritize self care. Setting a comfortable reading environment, creating a cozy and comfortable reading space with soft lighting, a comfortable chair or blanket, or any other elements that help you relax and unwind. This can make it easier to overcome feelings of fatigue and get lost in a good book. So go with it, get cozy. I always think of...
Those of you that are around my age, you probably know never ending story. And I think they actually re -released it, but that whole idea, he got onto the blanket and with his flashlight and he got totally lost in a book. I love that. Like that vision, just like, if you have a corner in your house that you can set up as your little reading corner, that's awesome. Do it, do it. All right. So dealing with interruptions, two ways you can deal with interruptions. You designate your reading time and you communicate your expectations.
So establish specific times during the day when interruptions are minimized, such as early in the morning before the rest of your house wakes up, during nap time or quiet time if you have younger children, or after your kids have gone to bed at night. The point is, is you want to make sure that you are allotting specific times that you're not gonna be distracted as much as those busier times of the day. If you're trying to read while your kids are...
eating breakfast and trying to get out of the house. It's just not going to work. Right. I think we can all agree on that. And then talking to your kids and your husband about the importance of respecting your reading time, explaining to them why uninterrupted time for yourself is beneficial for everyone in your family. So just making those expectations clear and helping them see why it's important for you to have that time. Okay. Now guilt, guilt can be a challenge when you're trying to make time for reading and.
one of the things that helps is reframing your perspective. Recognizing that self -care, including activities like reading, is essential for your wellbeing and overall happiness. Viewing it as an investment in yourself and your ability to be a better parent can help alleviate those feelings of guilt. And then involving your family. Instead of trying to avoid them to read, instead involve them and help them understand the importance of self -care by involving them in the process.
Onnie Michalsky (11:41.045)
Encourage your kids to engage in independent activities, maybe they can read, while you read. And use it as an opportunity to teach them the value of taking care of yourself. I'm going to zoom through these last few because I want you to get the information. I want you to get some ideas on how you can start to read more. And then we're going to wrap it up. So to deal with the overwhelm.
I want you to set realistic goals. Break down your reading goals into smaller, more manageable tasks. Instead of focusing on the number of books that you want to read in a year, set some monthly or even weekly reading goals to feel achievable, that feel achievable within your current schedule. So if you are going through a very busy season of life, like depending on what activities your kids are in, what things that you have, what plates you are spinning,
I want you to take that into account and say, maybe this season, while everything's going on, I'm only going to focus on reading two pages a day or, you know, one chapter a week, whatever is realistic for you. And then maybe participating in some reading challenges, participating in reading challenges or book clubs, the Mazat 'ak Caves book club, it'll help you add structure and motivation to your reading routine.
Challenges can provide a sense of community and accountability, making it easier to stay on track with your reading goals. So doing it in a community where others are counting on you or that you're trying to work towards a certain reward is going to help you stay on track. Okay, dealing with the lack of focus, engaging with the techs.
actively engage with the material as you read by asking yourself some questions, making predictions, summarizing key points, you know, all of those things that we learned back in third grade. Those are the things that we can bring to our current reading to be able to help us focus more and stay on task. It not only helps to maintain focus, but it also helps you improve, it helps to improve you comprehending the material as well as retaining it.
Onnie Michalsky (13:52.621)
taking notes in the margin or getting some index cards and taking notes or a notebook and writing down jotting down some things that you're learning that you can take away from what you're reading. And then experimenting with different formats. If you're struggling to focus on sitting down and actually reading a book, maybe you will benefit from trying an audio book. There's also an app, Short Forms, and it is a way to get non -fiction books. I don't think they actually have fiction books.
but on non -fiction books, a lot of things of business and health and all different things. You can get in there and actually they provide you with the meat of the book you can work through and you can listen to it or you can read it. And it's just in what it says short form. So experimenting with those different formats can help improve your ability to focus on what you're reading and to deal with the challenge of not having access to books, utilizing local libraries.
Nowadays, you can download Libby or Hoopla, Library2Go, Mobile Library. There's so many different apps there that give you access to your local library or even at the state level where you can, where it makes it really easy to borrow books for free. All you need is a library card. Most libraries offer a wide selection of books. They include bestsellers, classics, children's lit. I'm always telling my clients, go to your library because...
It is just this amazing resource that can open you to a whole nother world. And then sharing books with family and friends. Back in fourth grade, I remember the babysitter's club. We used to constantly be sharing books and we were always, did you read this number and sharing those books, anything? Why not do that as an adult? Share books with your friends and family members or even your neighbors who have similar reading interests. Borrow books from each other.
organize book swaps, to exchange books. It'll allow you to discover some new authors and genres even. So that's it. That's all I have today. During today's episode, we talked about the common challenges that moms face when trying to make time for reading. I offered her lots of different ways to overcome these challenges. Come join the Moms Without Capes book club. Join the club and let's learn and grow together. Go to momswiththecapes .com book club.
Onnie Michalsky (16:11.821)
or click the link in today's show notes. Go ahead and check out what books we plan on reading. This is the book we're actually gonna discuss next. Love Your Kids Without Losing Yourself by Dr. Morgan Cutlip. This is a great book. Whether you join the book club or not, I encourage you to read this book. All right, take care everyone and I will see you in the group.
