Have you ever felt the weight of unrealistic expectations, the pressure to be a super-mom, and the constant struggle to do it all perfectly? If so, you're not alone. In the world of motherhood, where every detail seems crucial, finding balance can be challenging. Enter the 80/20 rule, or the Pareto Principle, named after the Italian economist Vilfredo Pareto. This principle suggests that 80% of results come from 20% of causes—a concept that can revolutionize how moms approach their daily lives.

Understanding the 80/20 Rule: Examples from Everyday Life

To grasp the essence of the 80/20 rule, consider everyday examples:

• 80% of crimes are committed by 20% of criminals.
• 20% of drivers cause 80% of traffic accidents.
• Only 20% of appliances consume 80% of the energy at home.
• 80% of global wealth is concentrated in the hands of 20% of the population.
• We wear only 20% of our clothing 80% of the time.

Now, imagine applying this principle to the challenges faced by...

In the whirlwind of motherhood, it's easy to fall into the trap of trying to be everything to everyone. In this blog post, we'll explore the concepts of embracing imperfection and setting realistic expectations to break free from the cycle of maternal gatekeeping.

Understanding Maternal Gatekeeping

Maternal gatekeeping can sneak into our lives when we least expect it. It's that tendency to take on everything ourselves, thinking no one else can meet our standards. Today, let's shed light on two key concepts that can help us overcome this challenge: accepting imperfection and setting realistic expectations.

Embracing Imperfection

Cultivating a Growth Mindset

One powerful way to combat maternal gatekeeping is by fostering a growth mindset. Let's view mistakes and imperfections as opportunities for growth rather than shortcomings. As moms, we can model this mindset for our children, showing them that life is a continuous learning journey.

Practicing Self-Compassion

It's time to let go...

Motherhood is undoubtedly one of the most rewarding journeys in life, but it often comes with a multitude of responsibilities and expectations. In the whirlwind of caring for our little ones, supporting our partners, and managing household tasks, it's easy for moms to inadvertently lose themselves in the process.

The tendency to prioritize others' needs over their own can gradually lead to a disconnection from their own identity and desires, ultimately impacting their mental well-being and self-esteem.

The Perils of People-Pleasing

The all-too-familiar trap of people-pleasing tends to engulf many mothers, leading them to continuously put others' needs before their own.

It starts with small compromises, saying "yes" to tasks they don't have the bandwidth for, or sacrificing personal time to accommodate everyone else's schedules. Over time, this behavior can erode boundaries, resulting in emotional exhaustion and a diminished sense of self-worth.

Download this cheat sheet to help you...

Whether you're a mom, a partner, a friend, or anyone navigating the intricate web of human connections, understanding the significance of knowing what you need is paramount. By recognizing your unique needs, you can effectively ask the right person for the specific relational nutrients that can enrich your bonds.

Relational Nutrients: A Two-Way Exchange

Our relationships thrive when there's a reciprocal exchange of relational nutrients. These essential elements are crucial for mutual growth and connection. However, to make this exchange effective, it's equally important to know what you need and from whom. 

In the video, I share about many relational nutrients, but let's review a few of these so that you get an idea of the importance of why we need to identify and communicate what we need. 

1. Validation: Validation begins with acknowledging your own emotions and understanding your need for validation. By doing so, you can effectively communicate this need to the right...

As moms, we often find ourselves navigating a challenging journey filled with love, joy, and responsibilities. I want to begin by sharing a bit of my own story, which I believe many of you can relate to.

Recently, I've been on a quest to find balance between my demanding work schedule, family responsibilities, and, most importantly, my own health. Like many of you, I've encountered obstacles that make finding "me-time" feel like a distant dream. But it's crucial, and in this blog post, we'll dive deep into why it's not just important but necessary for moms to make time for themselves.

Defining Me-Time and Its Significance

First things first, let's define what me-time is. Me-time is that precious, intentional period where you put yourself first. It's an opportunity to focus on your needs, desires, and overall well-being. Why is it crucial? Because it has a profound impact on our physical and mental health, our relationships, and our overall happiness.

Imagine me-time as a pause...

The results are in and it is just as I suspected- I'm a mess. I'm no doctor but I could just feel that I was all over the place, which is why I wanted to go to the naturopathic doc in the first place.

My follow up appointment is not for another three weeks, but fortunately, my sister-in-law is a nurse practitioner and can read lab results so last night I showed her what I've got and she analyzed the numbers.

First of all, my heart looks good, or all the numbers that would point to my heart being good- were well in the normal range.

TSH which is what they use to measure my thyroid function is high, which is somewhat surprising since I am pretty religious about taking my medication each day.

That probably has to get retested and my meds adjusted.

Uric acid and potassium are high too, which when I took it into my own hands and looked on Google, this meant that I was having kidney failure!

But, according to my SIL, I am not dying. I do need to make adjustments though and eat more...

I've always been a traditional medicine type of girl and thought anything else was kind of woo but recently I attended a local women's retreat and one of the speakers was a naturopathic doctor who introduced me to the functional medicine matrix. 

I immediately knew that this was something I wanted to explore more. If you're unfamiliar, the matrix is a tool to help clinicians examine the body systems, symptoms, and risk factors associated with their patient’s health conditions.

It takes into account mental, emotional, and spiritual aspects of health and lifestyle factors. Whereas traditional medicine aims to assess symptoms, seeking to name a diagnosis and prescribe medication, functional medicine is more focused on finding the root cause(s) of a health condition.

When I heard the doctor speak, I was drawn to her. Her mother stood in the back of the room, walking in and out while bouncing the doctor's baby on her hip while the woman up front shared with us her...

As mothers, our lives often revolve around the needs of our children, leaving little room for our own personal growth and fulfillment. However, it's crucial to remember that prioritizing ourselves is not selfish—it's necessary for our overall well-being.

Let's explore the importance of reclaiming our sense of self and how coaching can be a transformative tool for busy moms like us.

We dedicate ourselves wholeheartedly to our children, which is a beautiful thing. However, it's essential to maintain our own identity and pursue our dreams and passions.

Reclaiming our sense of self is not only beneficial for personal growth, but it also enables us to be better mothers. Taking a moment to reflect on our own journeys can help us understand the significance of balancing our roles as moms and individuals.

Feeling overwhelmed, stuck, or uncertain about the next steps in life is common, especially during times of transition or personal growth.

If you find yourself at a crossroads,...

Are you tired of feeling overwhelmed and burnt out as a mother? Do you struggle to set boundaries with your kids or loved ones?

Today, we will be debunking common myths about boundaries and sharing the truth about setting healthy ones.

As a mother, it's easy to put your own needs on the back burner and focus solely on your children and their well-being. However, setting boundaries is essential for maintaining your mental health and well-being.

Boundaries are simply guidelines that you establish for yourself and others to create a sense of safety, respect, and balance in your life.

Setting boundaries is often seen as selfish or unnecessary, but this couldn't be further from the truth.

Myth #1: Setting boundaries is selfish.

This myth is false and can actually lead to burnout. When you don't set boundaries, you are essentially giving others permission to take advantage of your time and energy. This can leave you feeling drained, resentful, and overwhelmed.

By setting boundaries,...

Motherhood can be one of the most rewarding experiences in a woman's life. But it can also be one of the most challenging. There's no doubt that being a mother comes with a lot of pressure, especially with unrealistic expectations of what it means to be a "good" mother. 

From society's expectations to the pressure we put on ourselves, it's easy to get caught up in the idea that we need to be perfect.

Let’s take a deep dive into the impact of the expectations we hold about our role as a mom and explore the ways in which unrealistic expectations can lead to feelings of inadequacy, guilt, and shame. Of course, we’ll also attempt to rewrite the definition of what it means to be a "good" mom.

First, let's talk about the unrealistic expectations that many of us face. Society has long held a certain image of what a "perfect" mother looks like. She's patient, nurturing, and always puts her children's needs before her own. She never loses her temper, never makes mistakes,...