Moms Without Capes®

Today, we’re discussing an important topic—setting boundaries. As mothers, it’s easy to get wrapped up in the daily hustle and bustle of parenting and career without taking time for yourself.

Setting boundaries is a great way to take charge of your life and create a better balance between your family and professional life. It’s not always easy to set boundaries, but it’s so important for your mental and emotional well-being.

When you set boundaries, you’re telling the world that you are in control of your own life and that you won’t allow yourself to be taken advantage of. Boundaries also make it easier to ask for help when you need it, and to say no to commitments that don’t align with your values.

So, how can you get started setting boundaries?

Here are a few tips:

1. Identify Your Needs: Take some time to think about what your physical, emotional, and mental needs are. Once you’ve identified them, it’s easier to set...

It's no secret that the struggle is real for working moms. The expectations placed on them by society, their families, and even themselves can be overwhelming. Not only do they have to balance a full-time job, but they are also responsible for taking care of their children, running a household, and often times handling their spouse's responsibilities as well. This can lead to extreme levels of stress, resentment, and detachment from their spouses. 

The problem with the “help” a husband may offer is that it often assumes that the job was primarily her responsibility, and that he is only offering assistance out of obligation. This puts an unfair burden on the wife, who is expected to take initiative and make all the decisions in the home. When a dad is willing to help, he often has to be asked what needs to be done; this gives the impression that he is incapable or unhelpful, when in reality he is more than capable and willing to take part in the family duties. 

This past summer, I was on the verge of asking my husband for a divorce. There, I said it. Spoiler alert: We are now working on making our marriage stronger than ever and I'll share how later in this post.

Because my husband travels for work, I felt disconnected, alone, and at the end of my rope. He was quite literally a paycheck. To protect myself from being on an emotional rollercoaster every time he left, I detached altogether. We were no longer a team.

I felt like I was doing it all. 

Here I was, building a business where I was coaching moms about how to not do it all

and I was at a place where I couldn't figure out how to not do it all myself.

I was exhausted, really. I had been doing individual counseling for two years, working on various aspects of my life and the conversation always seemed to come back to my relationship with my husband.

A little back history- we've been married 23 years and it was a shotgun wedding. We had only known one another for a few months and...

As a mom, it can feel like you’re constantly juggling multiple tasks and responsibilities. Between work, kids, and the other demands of life, it can be overwhelming trying to prioritize and stay on top of everything. That’s why having a word of the year can be so helpful.

A word of the year can be whatever you want it to be. It can be a single word that encapsulates what you need more of, what you want to focus on, or what you need to improve on. It can be a feeling – how you want to feel throughout the year. It can be a theme or overarching focus for your year ahead. And it can help you with making decisions – what you want more of and what you want less of in your life.

One example of a great word of the year for moms is “balance”. Balance can mean so many different things. It can mean taking the time to care for yourself and your family. It can mean prioritizing time to rest and recharge. It can mean finding a balance between work and home. No...

Are you a mom who is feeling overwhelmed and exhausted? Are you feeling like you are trying to juggle all the hats you have to wear, from the mom-hat to the manager-hat to the chef-hat? And no matter how hard you try, you just can't seem to get ahead?

It's time to stop and take a minute to check in with yourself. To be honest with yourself, it's important to take a moment and ask yourself, "How do I feel right now?"

Being self-aware is the key to understanding your emotions better.

Being self-aware is the key to understanding your emotions better. It's not always easy to put words to our feelings, but it can be helpful to create a list of words that describe your feelings. Then, rate the intensity of those emotions on a scale of 1 to 10. 

Now, the next step is to understand where these feelings are coming from. It could be from past experiences or beliefs that you have about yourself and your abilities. Identifying these thoughts can help you to challenge them. 

Are you...

We all know the feeling of overwhelm—it's natural and it's inevitable. But that doesn't mean every day has to include feelings of overwhelm. So where does it come from? 

It often starts with our own expectations and perception—we expect ourselves to do too much, think we have to do all the things and take on too much responsibility, and struggle to accurately judge the amount of time we have available. All of these create an environment where our stress response is activated—which can look like yelling or lashing out at our kids, losing patience, unexplainable crying spells, angry tears that happen over small things, downing wine every night or binge-eating, zoning out on our phone as an escape, feeling stuck or trapped, and having difficulty concentrating or making decisions. 

But it doesn't have to be like this. We can make overwhelm not normal, and there are a few steps we can take to make sure our days don't end in a sea of overwhelm. Letting go of...

Are you a worrier? Do you tend to catastrophize and dwell on things that you can't control? If so, you're not alone.

Most of us worry from time to time. It's a normal part of life. But for some of us, worry can become a full-time occupation. We can't seem to turn it off. And it can take a toll on our physical and mental health.

So why do we worry? And what can we do about it?

Most of us worry about things that have already happened or that might happen in the future. We worry about things that we can't control. This kind of worry is different from thinking. Thinking is a normal part of life. It helps us solve problems and make decisions. But worry is different. It's characterized by catastrophizing, is repetitive, and is unproductive.

Why do we worry?

There are a few reasons. First, worry can be a way of avoiding something that we don't want to deal with. It's easier to worry about something that might happen than to deal with something that is happening. Second, worry can be a way...

Mom guilt is one of those things that every mother deals with at some point. It's that little voice in the back of your head that tells you you're not doing enough, that you're screwing up, or that you're not cut out for this whole motherhood gig. It's the shoulds and the supposed to's that are clanking around in your head as you try to make it through the day.

Guilt is a normal part of motherhood, but it can also be destructive. When mom guilt is allowed to take over, it can lead to some pretty harsh consequences, like substance use, thoughts of harm to self or others, anxiety, and depression. 

Part of the problem is that we live in a society that idealizes motherhood. There are images of perfect moms everywhere we look, and it's easy to compare ourselves to them and come up short. But the truth is, there is no such thing as a perfect mom. We're all just doing the best we can with the resources we have.

If you're struggling with mom guilt, the first step is to identify the...

Self-care is important for everyone, but it's especially important for moms. When you take care of yourself, it shows in your mood and overall demeanor. You'll be happier and more relaxed, which will make being around you more enjoyable for everyone.

But self-care isn't just about being happy and relaxed. It also has a direct impact on your relationships. Here are some ways that self-care can help your relationships:

1. You'll be more present and engaged with your family.

When you're taking care of yourself, you're more likely to be able to give your loved ones the attention they deserve. You won't be as distracted or preoccupied with other things, and you'll be more present in the moment.

2. You'll have more energy and resources to devote to your relationships.

When you're taking care of yourself, you'll have more energy and resources to devote to your relationships. You'll be able to give more of yourself to your loved ones, and you'll be more likely to invest in the relationship....

Everything you do now had a first time!

We all know the saying, "There's no such thing as a newbie," but the truth is, everything we do now had a first time. And for most of us, that first time is what gets us out of a rut and really makes us feel alive.

The problem with comfort zones is that they offer zero growth. We don't discover anything about ourselves when we're in our comfort zones because we're not challenged. But when we step out of our comfort zones and into the unknown, that's when the magic happens.

Everyday adventures (think small)

One of the best things about adventures is that they don't have to be big to be impactful. Sometimes the smallest things can have the biggest impact on our lives. Here are some examples of everyday adventures you can try:

• Sign up with a friend to walk, jog, or run a short race.
• Take a day trip to a place you've wanted to visit, but haven't.
• Try a new fitness class.
• Take a class - language, sewing, quilting, soapmaking, coffee 101,...