Boundaries are in the Bag: Taking Responsibility for What Belongs to You


Let's dive into a crucial topic that shapes the essence of our lives – Boundaries. In this post (& above video), I'll be sharing insights into what boundaries truly are, why they matter, and equipping you with three transformative steps to create healthier boundaries that can elevate your relationships.

Defining Boundaries: Protecting What Matters

Boundaries, at their core, declare a simple yet powerful message: "I belong to me, and you belong to you." They go beyond separation; they act as guardians, protecting what we hold dear, including our own lives and bodies. Boundaries establish a framework of acceptability in our lives and the lives of those around us.

They are the key to maintaining a sense of identity and personal space, providing the freedom to express needs, feelings, and opinions without fear of judgment or rejection.

The Backpack Analogy: What's in Your Bag?

Imagine your life as a backpack filled with essentials – health, body, faith,...

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The Truth about Boundaries


Are you tired of feeling overwhelmed and burnt out as a mother? Do you struggle to set boundaries with your kids or loved ones?

Today, we will be debunking common myths about boundaries and sharing the truth about setting healthy ones.

As a mother, it's easy to put your own needs on the back burner and focus solely on your children and their well-being. However, setting boundaries is essential for maintaining your mental health and well-being.

Boundaries are simply guidelines that you establish for yourself and others to create a sense of safety, respect, and balance in your life.

Setting boundaries is often seen as selfish or unnecessary, but this couldn't be further from the truth.

Myth #1: Setting boundaries is selfish.

This myth is false and can actually lead to burnout. When you don't set boundaries, you are essentially giving others permission to take advantage of your time and energy. This can leave you feeling drained, resentful, and overwhelmed.

By setting boundaries,...

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Why Can't We Just Say "No"?


Have you ever found yourself saying yes to something, even though every fiber of your being was screaming no? Have you ever felt guilty for not being able to say no to a friend, family member, or colleague?

If you answered yes to any of these questions, then you are not alone.

Why is it so stinkin' hard to just say no to people? The answer is simple: we want to please others.

As mothers, we have been conditioned to put the needs of others before our own. We are told to be selfless, to always be there for our children, our spouses, and our friends. And while there is nothing wrong with being there for others, it becomes problematic when we neglect our own needs.

When we say yes to someone, even when we don't want to, we are essentially saying no to ourselves. We are giving away our time, energy, and resources to someone or something that doesn't align with our values and priorities. This can leave us feeling drained, overwhelmed, and resentful.

So why do we continue to say yes when...

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Permission to Be Unavailable


As mothers, we understand the importance of taking time for ourselves. We know that in order to stay mentally healthy and experience positive growth, we must carve out time for ourselves away from the roles we play in our daily lives. However, too often we struggle with the what, how, and when of making this happen.

We are culturally conditioned to put ourselves last, rather than recognizing the value of our own time and carving out uninterrupted moments for creative self-expression. That's why it's so important to understand that our time is finite and should be guarded and respected. 

Eve Rodsky, author of “Fair Play” and “Find Your Unicorn Space,” captures our dilemma perfectly when she says, “You are complicit in your own oppression when you willingly put yourself and your time second or last.” 

So how do we make time for ourselves? Well, first of all, we should strive to create moments of “flow”. Flow is a mental state...

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Step Up and Set Boundaries


Today, we’re discussing an important topic—setting boundaries. As mothers, it’s easy to get wrapped up in the daily hustle and bustle of parenting and career without taking time for yourself.

Setting boundaries is a great way to take charge of your life and create a better balance between your family and professional life. It’s not always easy to set boundaries, but it’s so important for your mental and emotional well-being.

When you set boundaries, you’re telling the world that you are in control of your own life and that you won’t allow yourself to be taken advantage of. Boundaries also make it easier to ask for help when you need it, and to say no to commitments that don’t align with your values.

So, how can you get started setting boundaries?

Here are a few tips:

1. Identify Your Needs: Take some time to think about what your physical, emotional, and mental needs are. Once you’ve identified them, it’s easier to set...

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Stop Thinking Overwhelm is Normal!


We all know the feeling of overwhelm—it's natural and it's inevitable. But that doesn't mean every day has to include feelings of overwhelm. So where does it come from? 

It often starts with our own expectations and perception—we expect ourselves to do too much, think we have to do all the things and take on too much responsibility, and struggle to accurately judge the amount of time we have available. All of these create an environment where our stress response is activated—which can look like yelling or lashing out at our kids, losing patience, unexplainable crying spells, angry tears that happen over small things, downing wine every night or binge-eating, zoning out on our phone as an escape, feeling stuck or trapped, and having difficulty concentrating or making decisions. 

But it doesn't have to be like this. We can make overwhelm not normal, and there are a few steps we can take to make sure our days don't end in a sea of overwhelm. Letting go of...

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Honor Your Boundaries


It's so important that we learn to honor our own boundaries before we try to teach others how to do the same. Why? Because if we can't even manage and respect our own limits, how can we expect anyone else to?

There are many areas in our lives where having strong self-boundaries can be helpful. Here are just a few:

- Finances: We need to be able to say no to unnecessary spending and know our limits.

- Self-care: We need to put ourselves first sometimes and not feel guilty about it. This means saying no to things that would drain us emotionally or physically, and making time for things that nurture us.

- Time management: We need to be able to set limits on our time and stick to them. This means learning to say no to things that would eat up too much of our time and energy, and learning to stick to our own schedule.

- Treatment from others: We need to be able to set boundaries with others and not allow them to treat us in ways that are disrespectful or hurtful. This means learning to...

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Communicating Your Needs


Setting boundaries is hard.

As mothers, we are constantly giving of ourselves. We nurture and care for our children day in and day out. We put their needs before our own, often at our own expense.

It's no wonder then that setting boundaries can be so difficult. We're so used to putting other people's needs before our own, that when it comes time to set a boundary, we can feel guilty, afraid, and sad.

But it's important to remember that setting boundaries is not a bad thing. In fact, it's healthy for you to have boundaries. Other people have boundaries that you are expected to respect, and setting boundaries is a sign of a healthy relationship.



If communicating your needs ruins the relationship, then your relationship was on the cusp of ending anyways.

So how do you deal with the discomfort of setting boundaries?

First, feel it. Sit with the discomfort and allow yourself to feel the full range of emotions.

Then, journal about it. Write down your thoughts and feelings....

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