We all know the feeling of overwhelm—it's natural and it's inevitable. But that doesn't mean every day has to include feelings of overwhelm. So where does it come from?
It often starts with our own expectations and perception—we expect ourselves to do too much, think we have to do all the things and take on too much responsibility, and struggle to accurately judge the amount of time we have available. All of these create an environment where our stress response is activated—which can look like yelling or lashing out at our kids, losing patience, unexplainable crying spells, angry tears that happen over small things, downing wine every night or binge-eating, zoning out on our phone as an escape, feeling stuck or trapped, and having difficulty concentrating or making decisions.
But it doesn't have to be like this. We can make overwhelm not normal, and there are a few steps we can take to make sure our days don't end in a sea of overwhelm. Letting go of...
Are you a worrier? Do you tend to catastrophize and dwell on things that you can't control? If so, you're not alone.
Most of us worry from time to time. It's a normal part of life. But for some of us, worry can become a full-time occupation. We can't seem to turn it off. And it can take a toll on our physical and mental health.
So why do we worry? And what can we do about it?
Most of us worry about things that have already happened or that might happen in the future. We worry about things that we can't control. This kind of worry is different from thinking. Thinking is a normal part of life. It helps us solve problems and make decisions. But worry is different. It's characterized by catastrophizing, is repetitive, and is unproductive.
Why do we worry?
There are a few reasons. First, worry can be a way of avoiding something that we don't want to deal with. It's easier to worry about something that might happen than to deal with something that is happening. Second, worry can be a way...
Mom guilt is one of those things that every mother deals with at some point. It's that little voice in the back of your head that tells you you're not doing enough, that you're screwing up, or that you're not cut out for this whole motherhood gig. It's the shoulds and the supposed to's that are clanking around in your head as you try to make it through the day.
Guilt is a normal part of motherhood, but it can also be destructive. When mom guilt is allowed to take over, it can lead to some pretty harsh consequences, like substance use, thoughts of harm to self or others, anxiety, and depression.
Part of the problem is that we live in a society that idealizes motherhood. There are images of perfect moms everywhere we look, and it's easy to compare ourselves to them and come up short. But the truth is, there is no such thing as a perfect mom. We're all just doing the best we can with the resources we have.
If you're struggling with mom guilt, the first step is to identify the...
Self-care is important for everyone, but it's especially important for moms. When you take care of yourself, it shows in your mood and overall demeanor. You'll be happier and more relaxed, which will make being around you more enjoyable for everyone.
But self-care isn't just about being happy and relaxed. It also has a direct impact on your relationships. Here are some ways that self-care can help your relationships:
When you're taking care of yourself, you're more likely to be able to give your loved ones the attention they deserve. You won't be as distracted or preoccupied with other things, and you'll be more present in the moment.
When you're taking care of yourself, you'll have more energy and resources to devote to your relationships. You'll be able to give more of yourself to your loved ones, and you'll be more likely to invest in the relationship....
Everything you do now had a first time!
We all know the saying, "There's no such thing as a newbie," but the truth is, everything we do now had a first time. And for most of us, that first time is what gets us out of a rut and really makes us feel alive.
The problem with comfort zones is that they offer zero growth. We don't discover anything about ourselves when we're in our comfort zones because we're not challenged. But when we step out of our comfort zones and into the unknown, that's when the magic happens.
Everyday adventures (think small)
One of the best things about adventures is that they don't have to be big to be impactful. Sometimes the smallest things can have the biggest impact on our lives. Here are some examples of everyday adventures you can try:
If you're a mom, you know that stress is just a part of life. But what happens when stress becomes chronic? How does it affect you and your family? And most importantly, how can you manage it?
Chronic stress is defined as any type of stress that lasts for more than a few months. It can come from many sources, including work, relationships, finances, and even your daily commute. And while a little bit of stress can be good for you, chronic stress can have a serious impact on your health.
So how does chronic stress affect you? Well, it can take a toll on your physical and mental health. It can make you more susceptible to illness and disease, and it can also lead to anxiety, depression, and other mental health issues. It can also affect your relationships, your work performance, and your ability to parent.
So what can you do to manage chronic stress? Well, there are a number of things you can do to make your life a little bit easier. Here are a few tips:
Identify the sources of your...
It's so important that we learn to honor our own boundaries before we try to teach others how to do the same. Why? Because if we can't even manage and respect our own limits, how can we expect anyone else to?
There are many areas in our lives where having strong self-boundaries can be helpful. Here are just a few:
- Finances: We need to be able to say no to unnecessary spending and know our limits.
- Self-care: We need to put ourselves first sometimes and not feel guilty about it. This means saying no to things that would drain us emotionally or physically, and making time for things that nurture us.
- Time management: We need to be able to set limits on our time and stick to them. This means learning to say no to things that would eat up too much of our time and energy, and learning to stick to our own schedule.
- Treatment from others: We need to be able to set boundaries with others and not allow them to treat us in ways that are disrespectful or hurtful. This means learning to...
If you're like me, you might find that you have a lot of thoughts running through your head at any given moment. And sometimes, those thoughts can be a bit of a jumble! If you're feeling like you could use a little organization and clarity in your life, journaling might be for you.
Different from simply writing in a diary, journaling for self-discovery can be a way to reflect on where you are in your life, where you want to be, and the points where you feel stuck. It can also help you to get a different perspective on things, and to bring in more of your senses to the experience (which can be helpful in grounding yourself).
Not only that, but journaling is also good for your mental health, mood, immune system, and stress levels (studies have shown this to be true!). So if you're looking for a way to improve your overall well-being, journaling might be a great option for you.
All you need to get started is a journal or notebook (fancy or not), a pen, and 15 to 30 minutes of free...
Why is resting so hard?
For many of us, resting is hard because our brains are wired for survival. This means that our brains are constantly on the lookout for danger, and this can make it difficult for us to relax.
When we can't rest, we often think that something is wrong with us. This is because our nervous system is used to operating under high stress, and so doing nothing can be very uncomfortable.
When we do try to rest, our brain often resists because it doesn't want to notice any uncomfortable thoughts or emotions that may be lurking beneath the surface. However, by taking some time to rest, we can give our brains a much-needed break from the constant stress and distractions of everyday life.
There are many different types of rest, and so it's important to find the one that works best for you. Some people find that physical rest, such as sleeping or taking a nap, is most helpful. Others find that mental rest, such as taking short breaks throughout the day, is more...
Setting boundaries is hard.
As mothers, we are constantly giving of ourselves. We nurture and care for our children day in and day out. We put their needs before our own, often at our own expense.
It's no wonder then that setting boundaries can be so difficult. We're so used to putting other people's needs before our own, that when it comes time to set a boundary, we can feel guilty, afraid, and sad.
But it's important to remember that setting boundaries is not a bad thing. In fact, it's healthy for you to have boundaries. Other people have boundaries that you are expected to respect, and setting boundaries is a sign of a healthy relationship.
If communicating your needs ruins the relationship, then your relationship was on the cusp of ending anyways.
So how do you deal with the discomfort of setting boundaries?
First, feel it. Sit with the discomfort and allow yourself to feel the full range of emotions.
Then, journal about it. Write down your thoughts and feelings....